


Waves

by Hotgitay



Series: Waves [1]
Category: Station 19 (TV)
Genre: Developing Relationship, Established Relationship, Fluff, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, LGBTQ Themes, M/M, Marriage, Married Couple, Married Life, Other, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-21
Updated: 2019-02-21
Packaged: 2019-11-01 11:53:09
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,134
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17866763
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hotgitay/pseuds/Hotgitay
Summary: Robert grieves and Lucas  is there to support him





	Waves

**Author's Note:**

> Mainly wrote this because I was bored and it was snowing all day also I was in the mood for soft sipley feels also I love one supportive couple  
> Lucas is just so supportive of Robert I love them Kay bye On my way! To write more sipley content for y’all my main purpose in the station 19 fandom is to provide much needed sipley content

Robert thought he already got over his triggers, but apparently he hasn’t. He’s been through grief counseling. He’s been following all the advice given to him by his counselor, a lovely older woman named Carol, she was always really nice and friendly to him and she never once judged him.

Carol was always easy to talk to, even from that first session they had together. She mentioned that she was a grandmother and revealed to him that she lost her husband to cancer, forming a connection with Robert. He knew that he would be able to trust her because she was familiar with grief too. 

He was watching a movie where this guy lost his wife in a car accident. He forgot the name of the movie, but it was all so similar to what happened with Claire. That’s when it hit him. The memories of finding her at the scene of her car accident and then straight to her being dead.

A constant reminder of the fact that he was a widow. These memories always haunt him, he already has a new life for himself with his partner Lucas, he’s gotten married again... something he never thought he’d be interested in doing. His plans of being single forever changed when he found himself falling for his former best friend whom he blamed for his wife’s death, but a single movie caused him to break down like this. He felt weak, confused as to how to process his own emotions.

He felt broken. He was a mess, his whole world was falling down around him. The same way he felt when he lost Claire. He shouldn’t have watched that movie, now he was blaming himself for picking something that he had no idea would trigger him. 

“Please stay with me, I need you.” Robert whispered to Lucas. He needed his partner to be there for him, he couldn’t get through this alone. He extended his arms out, waiting to be embraced in a hug. He wanted affection and love. He just wanted a hug, he wanted to be held and told everything would be okay. 

Lucas realized that Robert was having an attack. Usually when this happened, he knew how to handle him, take care of him, and be there for him. Robert needed love and he was going to give it to him, make him feel safe. He hugged him, holding him close on the floor of their living room, whispering to him, “I’m here, I’m not gonna leave you.” Lucas then kissed Robert's forehead.

Robert relaxed into Lucas’s arms, rocking back and forth, trying to calm himself down. Being hugged and held by the man he loved and who loved him unconditionally in return, Lucas rocked back and forth with him. They were swaying together, sitting down on the floor, entrapped in a never ending cradling hug.

“I love you. Everything will be okay, I’m here.” Lucas told him repeatedly as they cradled together, still holding his younger partner close to him. Robert's eyes were stinging from the tears that continued to pour out. In the midst of him trying to disassociate from the waning reminders floating around in his head, he heard the familiar sound of his lover's voice.

“I love you too.” Robert croaked out, breaking his own silence, acknowledging his lover's presence. He wasn’t alone, he had him. Everything would be okay, that’s what Lucas told him. He needed to hear those words and when he heard him say it, it made him feel a little less sad and anxious.

“You’re safe with me, I’m not going anywhere, I promise you.” Lucas told his husband whom was still rocking himself back and forth in his arms, finding his own rhythm, trying to soothe away his anxiety.

“Sometimes the feelings, they come in waves. I think I’m doing just fine and then there’s that voice that reminds me that Claire is gone. Everything hits me. I still see you and me finding her body at that scene and my world just crumbles to pieces. I just want the pain to go away. I try and I try, and it’s not good enough.” Robert spoke again, his voice sounding wobbly. He had been crying. His grief over his dead wife can get triggered by the smallest of things, and this time was no different.

He hated Lucas seeing him like this.. lost without any sense of control. He was in a really tight place. Being vulnerable isn’t easy for him, he was exposed, but at the same time he was allowing himself to do this. Showing the bad part of his grief to his partner, the side of him that he hates the most.

“I see you. You try your hardest, you are trying your best and that’s all you can do. You can always talk to me about her, I’ll always listen to you. I may be your partner, but more importantly, I’m your friend. You can trust me to be there for you, we took an oath. For better or worse, and I intend to keep my end of the bargain. We will get through this together, one step at a time.” Lucas replied back to him. 

“It’s hard for me to tell you. There’s a lot I keep to myself. It shouldn’t be so hard for me. I trust you, I do, but I’ve only been able to speak about her to you on a few occasions. I don’t want to be that widow, the kind whom doesn’t shut up about their dead spouse, yet it’s the opposite, so I contradicted myself there. I appreciate you staying by my side when I needed you the most. I’m not crying anymore. Carol tells me I should talk about Claire more with you, bring us closer together that way.. maybe I should heed her advice.” Robert admitted to the older male.

“You can tell me as much as you want or as little as you want, I want you to be comfortable in whatever you choose to share with me about your life, and I’ll understand. I’d never be mad at you for being selective either, you are worthy of love. You deserve to be treated well and taken care of.” Lucas said, kissing him on the cheek as Robert nuzzled against him. 

“I feel safe now. I’m with my husband, my man, my guy, my best friend, my partner whom loves me unconditionally, and loves me for who I am. You give the best hugs. I’m not alone, I have you, and you’ve always been there for me in all aspects. You support me, I can be myself around you. I don’t feel as sad now, I’m happier because I have you.” Robert smiled slightly, nuzzling more into Lucas.


End file.
